@>-'-,--- Speedy Recovery---

So similar...

There is always a beginning.

It was beautiful and smooth, bring me alot of future thinking and expectation but hiccup will occur out of a sudden.

Very true, totally depicts what i went through. I know this time round, it is going be tough. You are not me, you have no idea how hurtful it was on me, but i have to brace through all alone. Too heavy on me. Days passed by in a daze. I live these days without having much recollection of what happened, each day passed by and i cant really remember what had happened the day before. Memory loss i tink. If only i can just erase the whole chunk of memory or better still, i will turn back time and not gone for that operation at all.

Ah ma gone and i did not have the chance to see for her last look.

This period i have been very down, my spirits can never be lifted up, how am i going regain my positivity? The kinda want very much to cry yet cant cry, it is even more tormenting. I can feel my dad's pain and he need us now, together strongly to show him the concern and care. Something is missing whereby my brother dont feel it. He does not know it at all, creating unneccessary problem for us.

A word kept flashing into my mind recently, immature. Seeing many things going on which i cannot stand it, why they did or think of such silly things? Colleagues, friends and even my brother...why? I feel i cannot communication with them anymore.

Whatever i want, i can never get in life-- NEVER! i cannot understand why. Did i had such bad karma in my previous life that i have to suffer this.

Granny (Mohamed ali lane ) say must know how to wash yourself, to bring the purity to life. Not every knots cannot be tangled off. Need to respect each other then everyone will live peacefully. She said no need to change for others, without any anger is good. Be myself to have such a good character, others will envious they dont have.

Well it has affect my work for one whole month. I cannot concentrate at work. I cannot work to my optimum lvl. It is pulling me down.
Tomorrow i am going to DSO, national laboratories to do some research and testing. Going be a hard week for me where i need to have a clear mind first.

I feel like giving up on this coming sat, 06/06' final competition, lack of supports and the morale is low. Well i hope to recover on that day immediately to perform my best, cannot afford to let this championship cup slipping off to other teams.

Happiness is something we must fight for and not wait for it to drop by. Some are lucky, happiness is always around them. As such, they dont value happiness as much. But for us who aint lucky enough, then we have to fight for it and do something about it. Rather than wait and mourne, happiness will never occur on us. Similarly, misery is not something we have to wait for it to disappear. It is something we have to get rid of. It is again dependent on ourselves to get rid of misery and not let it spoils the whole of us. Like the saying goes, a rotten apple if left unattended will spoil the whole basket of good apples. Just the same as misery, if we leave it unattended in us, it will only cause more misery in us. So i have decided, i will fight for my own happiness and get rid of my misery. Rather than indulge in self pity and self questioning about certain happenings. Things happen for a reason, they always do. If it happens not to your liking, be glad that it happened earlier than later. If things happen according to your plans, embrace it with gratefulness. No one can give me the happiness i want except myself because it is me myself who will determine to live happily or sadly.No one can cause more misery than myself because it is again myself who will allow the misery to set deeply in. I believe one day i have my own happiness to share and be proud of.

Dad not matter how hard you go through,

Daddy i ♥ u
Always..

Speedy Recovery!

Loves,
Joe Sim